<?xml version='1.0' encoding='UTF-8'?><?xml-stylesheet href="http://www.blogger.com/styles/atom.css" type="text/css"?><feed xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom' xmlns:openSearch='http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/' xmlns:georss='http://www.georss.org/georss' xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540</id><updated>2011-04-21T18:19:23.000-07:00</updated><category term='george carlin'/><category term='missing something'/><category term='vids'/><category term='rip'/><category term='thinking'/><title type='text'>Fantastic</title><subtitle type='html'></subtitle><link rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#feed' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default?max-results=100'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/'/><link rel='hub' href='http://pubsubhubbub.appspot.com/'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><generator version='7.00' uri='http://www.blogger.com'>Blogger</generator><openSearch:totalResults>7</openSearch:totalResults><openSearch:startIndex>1</openSearch:startIndex><openSearch:itemsPerPage>100</openSearch:itemsPerPage><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-7446577586676235165</id><published>2008-08-02T20:25:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-08-02T20:49:21.710-07:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;object height="344" width="425"&gt;&lt;param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/hz_h8o76icI&amp;amp;hl=en&amp;amp;fs=1"&gt;&lt;param 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name="allowFullScreen" value="true"&gt;&lt;embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ONjRlfWrhZI&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="344"&gt;&lt;/embed&gt;&lt;/object&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ccffff;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:180%;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;I LOVE MY Soaps&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff0000;"&gt;mostly&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-7446577586676235165?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/7446577586676235165/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link 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src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-9057568316128483315</id><published>2008-07-16T22:29:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-07-16T22:50:52.572-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Nerd Quotient a deux</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://www.nerdtests.com/nt2ref.html"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://www.nerdtests.com/images/badge/nt2/92e41d4b18c1e097.png" alt="NerdTests.com says I'm an Uber-Dorky Nerd God.  What are you?  Click here!"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-9057568316128483315?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/9057568316128483315/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5050902490245364540&amp;postID=9057568316128483315' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/9057568316128483315'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/9057568316128483315'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/2008/07/nerd-quotient-deux.html' title='Nerd Quotient a deux'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-9031771910560951625</id><published>2008-07-16T22:22:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-07-16T22:24:14.253-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Nerd Quotient ........</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://www.nerdtests.com/nq_ref.html"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://www.nerdtests.com/images/badge/1af241d47a2221f8.gif" alt="I am nerdier than 87% of all people. Are you a nerd? Click here to find out!"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-9031771910560951625?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/9031771910560951625/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5050902490245364540&amp;postID=9031771910560951625' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/9031771910560951625'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/9031771910560951625'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/2008/07/nerd-quotient.html' title='Nerd Quotient ........'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-9083261579792671019</id><published>2008-06-30T11:41:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-06-30T20:32:15.457-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Television</title><content type='html'>&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#339999;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;finally finished the fight with my Cable company, they lost, I don't pay them anymore.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Fortunately (or perhaps unfortunately for my wallet) most of the TV shows I paid to watch are now on DVD so I really am not missing anything..&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;One of those shows is Burn Notice (on USA, which I do kind of miss, usually around 3a.m.), I started watching BN because of Bruce Campbell, I like him, a really good charactor actor is really hard to find these days and Bruce Campbell is one of the most excellent ones.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5217880873444359650" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 419px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 244px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" height="244" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SGmjAkX0veI/AAAAAAAAAEc/i5WqLOZa9v4/s320/bcbanner.jpg" width="368" border="0" /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#00cccc;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Anyway, so I watched BN and I enjoyed it and then the Cable company and I started arguing and well, I own the 1st season of BN on DVD now (which is really cool because now I can admire all the scenery whenever I want)..&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;But as I was watching I started to wax nostalgic about TV, not the new stuff as such but the stuff I remember from when I was little and while surfing for fun I found an article that kind of explains better than I can what I feel when I watch BN: &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:times new roman;color:#ffcc00;"&gt;LIFE ON THE COUCH:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:times new roman;color:#cc9933;"&gt;Snarky, swaggering 'Burn Notice' bringing fun back to TV &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:times new roman;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff6600;"&gt;CHRISTOPHER LAWRENCE&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:times new roman;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffff00;"&gt;Each of us has our own way of realizing we're farther from the cradle than the grave.&lt;br /&gt;For some, it's the first time we're condescendingly called sir or ma'am.&lt;br /&gt;For others, it's the knowledge that in four months, one week, four days and a handful of hours, we could legally date someone born in the '90s. Not that I'm counting.&lt;br /&gt;Mine came a couple of days ago, listening to one of radio's countless morning zoos. Two DJs were discussing Erik Estrada, his recent commercials -- the ones selling dirt-cheap homesites in fabulous Nowhere, Arkansas -- and how much they miss "CHiPs."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.reviewjournal.com/webextras/"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:times new roman;color:#ffff00;"&gt;That's when the show's female sidekick -- the type who can rattle off with ease which celebs are sporting a baby bump and the latest guy to check into Hotel Britney -- declared she had no idea what "CHiPs" was. At that exact moment, my back went out, I started worrying about my retirement plan and I swear I got a liver spot.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Times New Roman;color:#339999;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;read the rest of the article here:&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.lvrj.com/living/9255071.html"&gt;http://www.lvrj.com/living/9255071.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#339999;"&gt;And then I was watching it again this morning (had to take a break from Doctor Who) and it dawned on me:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Bruce Campbell - June 22 1958&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="color:#cc0000;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Jeffrey Donovan - May 11&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt; 1968&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="color:#3366ff;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;are close enough in age that maybe they remember Television the same way I do!!&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="color:#3366ff;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;span style="color:#3366ff;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Which may explain why I enjoy their performances so much maybe they haven't bought into the Reality show craze as has every one else in TV Land, maybe they just want to entertain me, not teach me or show how screwed up they are, just entertain me and make me laugh while I watch them...&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt; &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#00cccc;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;Ya think??&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;color:#00cccc;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt; &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#3366ff;"&gt;Naw, that ain't it but it could be.....&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-9083261579792671019?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/9083261579792671019/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5050902490245364540&amp;postID=9083261579792671019' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/9083261579792671019'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/9083261579792671019'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/2008/06/television.html' title='Television'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SGmjAkX0veI/AAAAAAAAAEc/i5WqLOZa9v4/s72-c/bcbanner.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-6063382301433250863</id><published>2008-06-24T06:05:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-06-24T06:59:37.200-07:00</updated><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='vids'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='missing something'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='george carlin'/><title type='text'>Following George Carlin</title><content type='html'>&lt;iframe src="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22425001/vp/25326560#25326560" frameborder="0" width="425" scrolling="no" height="339"&gt;&lt;/iframe&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;iframe src="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22425001/vp/25333570#25333570" frameborder="0" width="425" scrolling="no" height="339"&gt;&lt;/iframe&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#6633ff;"&gt;On euphemisms for aging and death:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"'Older' sounds a little better than 'old,' doesn't it? Sounds like it might even last a little longer. ... I'm getting old. And it's OK. Because thanks to our fear of death in this country I won't have to die _ I'll 'pass away.' Or I'll 'expire,' like a magazine subscription. If it happens in the hospital they'll call it a 'terminal episode.' The insurance company will refer to it as 'negative patient care outcome.' And if it's the result of malpractice they'll say it was a 'therapeutic misadventure.'"&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#3366ff;"&gt;On getting old:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"... the best thing about getting old is you're not responsible for remembering things anymore. Even important things. 'But it was your daughter's funeral' 'I forgot!' You can even make believe you have Alzheimer's disease. It's a lot of fun. You can look around the dining room table and say, 'Who are you people and where is my horse?' And you look at your eldest son and you say, 'Agnes, I haven't seen ya since First Communion!'"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff0000;"&gt;On abortion:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"How come when it's us it's 'an abortion,' but when it's a chicken it's an omelet?"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#33cc00;"&gt;On religion:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;_ "Something is wrong here: War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption and the Ice Capades. Something is definitely wrong. This is not good work. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Results like these do not belong on the resume of a supreme being. This is the kinda (expletive) you'd expect from an office temp with a bad attitude."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#33cc00;"&gt;_ "You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. ... Two reasons: first of all, I think he's a good actor, OK? To me that counts. Second, he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn't (expletive) around."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff6600;"&gt;On "stuff":&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"That's all your house is _ it's a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. Now sometimes _ sometimes you gotta move. You gotta get a bigger house. Why? Too much stuff. You've gotta move all your stuff, and maybe put some of your stuff in storage. Imagine that _ there's a whole industry based on keeping on eye on your stuff."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff6666;"&gt;On "things you never see":&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"You never see a Rolls-Royce with a bumper sticker that says '(Expletive) happens.' You never see a really big, tall, fat Chinese guy with red hair."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#9999ff;"&gt;On his disdain for "soft names":&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"I'm getting really sick of guys named Todd. ... Where are all these goofy (expletive) boys' names coming from? Taylor, Tyler, Jordan, Flynn _ these are not real names. You wanna hear a real name? Eddie."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="color:#c0c0c0;"&gt;"Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?"&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;___&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="color:#cc33cc;"&gt;"I wonder why Kleenex doesn't have a target in the middle of it. Don't you think we need a bulls-eye right in the middle of the Kleenex?"&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="color:#cccccc;"&gt;+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;embed allowNetworking="all" allowScriptAccess="always" src="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4860fba31535270b" width="384" height="283" quality="high" wmode="transparent" id="W4860fba31535270b" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"&gt; &lt;/embed&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;http://www.cbsnews.com/sections/i_video/main500251.shtml?id=4204294n&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=5224354&amp;amp;affil=kapp+&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-6063382301433250863?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/6063382301433250863/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5050902490245364540&amp;postID=6063382301433250863' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/6063382301433250863'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/6063382301433250863'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/2008/06/following-george-carlin.html' title='Following George Carlin'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-1118502773063140193</id><published>2008-06-23T13:37:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-06-23T14:15:35.375-07:00</updated><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='thinking'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='george carlin'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='rip'/><title type='text'>George Carlin Quotes: May 12, 1937-June 22, 2008</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SGAO4R5inzI/AAAAAAAAAEM/-5R75He37JU/s1600-h/Carlin2_orig.jpg"&gt;&lt;img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215184728535244594" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SGAO4R5inzI/AAAAAAAAAEM/-5R75He37JU/s320/Carlin2_orig.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ffff00;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ffff00;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;Always do whatever's next.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcc66;"&gt;Atheism is a non-prophet organization.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#6666cc;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ffff33;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff99ff;"&gt;Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#c0c0c0;"&gt;Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffff00;"&gt;Electricity is really just organized lightning.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#99ffff;"&gt;Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ccffff;"&gt;Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcccc;"&gt;Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcc33;"&gt;"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#99ff99;"&gt;I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcccc;"&gt;I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcc99;"&gt;I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ffff99;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffffcc;"&gt;I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me - they're cramming for their final exam.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#99ff99;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#99ffff;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood. &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ccffff;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it. &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;color:#ccffff;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ccffff;"&gt;I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ccccff;"&gt;I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffccff;"&gt;If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#cccccc;"&gt;If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ff6666;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten. &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffff66;"&gt;In comic strips, the person on the right always speaks first.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffff33;"&gt;Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#66ff99;"&gt;Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#33ffff;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#66ffff;"&gt;Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#9999ff;"&gt;Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#9999ff;"&gt;One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff99ff;"&gt;One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#c0c0c0;"&gt;People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#c0c0c0;"&gt;Religion is just mind control.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff0000;"&gt;Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcc66;"&gt;Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffcc66;"&gt;The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffff00;"&gt;The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#33ff33;"&gt;The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#66cccc;"&gt;The status quo sucks.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff0000;"&gt;The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffff00;"&gt;There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#cc66cc;"&gt;There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#9999ff;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;Think off-center. &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ffffff;"&gt;Weather forecast for tonight: dark.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt; &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ffccff;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#6666cc;"&gt;What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#33ccff;"&gt;When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff6600;"&gt;When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#99ffff;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff9900;"&gt;When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Verdana;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;"&gt;&lt;span style="color:#ff99ff;"&gt;You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:verdana;color:#ffffcc;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215184373865377522" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SGAOjopp7vI/AAAAAAAAAEE/kzSzsj8Mrtk/s320/ALeqM5gHxMbVFEm1VVhtScn-coOZNy_hmA.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Do me a favor, George??&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;p align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Don't Rest In Peace.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Shake things up and make them think whereever you are, because when I get there, I am not wanting to play on a flipping harp or dance on the flames...&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;So do what you do best, make 'em think!!!&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Trebuchet MS;color:#ff0000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:Trebuchet MS;color:#ff0000;"&gt;Thanks for 40 years of laughter &amp;amp; thinking!!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-1118502773063140193?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/1118502773063140193/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5050902490245364540&amp;postID=1118502773063140193' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/1118502773063140193'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/1118502773063140193'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/2008/06/george-carlin-quotes-may-12-1937-june.html' title='George Carlin Quotes: May 12, 1937-June 22, 2008'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SGAO4R5inzI/AAAAAAAAAEM/-5R75He37JU/s72-c/Carlin2_orig.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5050902490245364540.post-3946269838166772454</id><published>2008-06-16T14:32:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-06-16T14:39:47.659-07:00</updated><title type='text'>So what happens when everybody lives?</title><content type='html'>&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#66cccc;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Well to begin with, I decided to make a place for all my tagging...&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SFbcudlOqmI/AAAAAAAAADk/b3ScmvNNmOw/s1600-h/CrystalCastle.gif"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#66cccc;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212596309500799586" style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SFbcudlOqmI/AAAAAAAAADk/b3ScmvNNmOw/s320/CrystalCastle.gif" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#66cccc;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;strong&gt; &lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#66cccc;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;strong&gt;I found this castle somewhere and it liked me so I took it home  and played with it..&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt; &lt;/div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/5050902490245364540-3946269838166772454?l=thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/feeds/3946269838166772454/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5050902490245364540&amp;postID=3946269838166772454' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/3946269838166772454'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/5050902490245364540/posts/default/3946269838166772454'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://thegoodthebadandthedreadful2.blogspot.com/2008/06/so-what-happens-when-everybody-lives.html' title='So what happens when everybody lives?'/><author><name>Awytch</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/14294502269399286701</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_xY4hDzuIFWo/SFbcudlOqmI/AAAAAAAAADk/b3ScmvNNmOw/s72-c/CrystalCastle.gif' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry></feed>
